In continuation : IS MARRIAGE REALLY WORTH IT?

Worth what pay- tell? All the suffering? All the heartache? All the endless concessions, sacrifice and contortions necessary to make your life jive with someone else's? My answer is a resounding and emphatic NO! The only reason we need marriage is because we don't behave well collectively without rules foisted upon us. Marriage as a legal entity serves only two redeeming purposes in my view: It legitimizes children and provides a legal process and protections to force people to behave humanely towards one another when they decide to split. Otherwise, marriage is quite frankly, a worthless romanticized notion promoting the ridiculous idea that two can actually become one without someone losing out.

I know, I know, my cynicism is the screeching hallmark of a divorced woman really not ! it sounds so.. And that assessment of my personal situation would be correct. But this is not a reactive position I'm taking. It is well thought out. Allow me to elaborate by asking a few questions and perhaps piercing the thin white veil of marriage to reveal the scarlet truth.

If you are currently married, do you wake up each day with renewed love and admiration for your spouse's individuality? Are you able to support yourself on your own without the assistance of your spouse should you need to? Do you know how to operate the stove, washing machine and dryer? Have you ever diapered your own baby? Do you take a turn paying the bills and managing the finances?Do you cook for your better half ?Do you enjoy outing?aAre you able to take good care of your spouse as promised on the altar infront of thousands of people?Is it always one sided? If you answered "no" to any of these questions I postulate that you are in a marriage of convenience reaping the benefits of an arrangement that may be working out now but is at risk in the long run for boredom, affairs and eventual breakdown.

Not true, you may be saying. How can she draw that stunning conclusion from those few questions? Easy. Each one of those questions, with the exception of the first one, implies that a person has taken on a certain role in the relationship. And while that may have some initial appeal, it creates an imbalance of power or an unhealthy reliance which usually means one person is taking on the bulk of certain traits like being nurturer. The truth is in order to be healthy, we need to possess and express the full breadth and depth of skills and emotions individually. Otherwise we become parasites and hosts clinging together in a grotesque but sustainable symbiosis sometimes referred to as marriage.

I also venture to assert that if two people did not have the confines of marriage, the legal and psychological equivalent to handcuffs, that both partners would work harder to maintain their individuality and also treasure their coupledom to a greater extent. In other words, they would both be better off.

Marriage is a great excuse to have a party, get dressed up and maybe buy some new shoes. But in the end, it's a fairy tale and there's seldom a happily ever after.

Marriage -isnt always a happy ending !

Every marriage will go through times of crisis. Some marriages will be strengthened by a crisis, others will be destroyed. Some tough times come from the big turning points in our lives..
But conflicts between husband and wife for a third person when in deep love? strange story right ?well here it goes : there was a couple too deeply in love but as they got married it all started,intervention and external pressures, trying to prove supremacy,not considering the partners feelings,all dreams finally shatter.

How do you know when love dies? This is actually a very easy question to answer it can't.
Love is a emotion that comes from deep within your heart. The love you have for a person is not something that you can just throw away when the time suits you. If you truly love a person, you will always love them no matter the outcome.

Love is a very complex emotion. There are different stages of love and many different types of love. You can love a person as a friend, you might just love someone because you do, and you might be head over heels in love to where you can't imagine being apart for one day.Now there are some things you do need to realize, just because you love a person does not necessarily mean you belong together forever. There are some people that would rather be happily divorced than unhappily married. Even though they are divorced they might still have strong feelings for one another and decide to stay best friends. Some people just don't go together, but they do belong in each others lives.

Some couples end up very badly and never wanna see that person again, but that still does not mean that you don't love that person. You might always love them for what you both shared together or maybe you love them for someone they once were.

answer the question again ; When does love die? It doesn't.


Which is better ? Happily divorced or Unhappily married ?

Rainbow

RAINBOW

The weather being all gloomy and drizzly in this hot hot summer brings myriad thoughts onto my mind.There seems to be a formation of rainbow.Its soo wonderful when i come to think of the Rainbow. I started reflecting on what a rainbow is, and how I, as well as everyone else,
seem to get so happy when they see one. When we witness the emergence of such sparkling and
magnificent colors, in the sky, it seems like pure magic. It causes us to look upwards into the heavens,
and for a few moments, you are lost in the beauty. All your cares seem to melt away, and you feel uplifted,
and refreshed, and I believe the child in us all, starts clapping, and jumping up and down, from sheer delight.


as some one quoted :

" I see rainbows, i see tomorrow,
I see us sending rainbow love.
I see rainbows, i see tomorrow,
I see us sending rainbow thoughts "

I have always loved the ethereal beauty of rainbows, and I’ve always loved associating them with God’s promise.I remember as a student of convent we were thought rainbow is a way of god's promise.
dividing line between the grey skies and the brighter sky, I realized that God’s promises are often the dividing line between hope and despair in the storms of life. Whether a sudden squall of disaster assails us or a slow-brewing storm erupts over us, only the solid, unmoving, unchangeable promises of God keep up anchored.

And so, in parting, I wish you, many glorious rainbows, as you walk this earth, and live each day. And if your heart sings, in a new way, when you see one, maybe it's because it is reminding you, of yourself.

Confidence and Trust - So inspiring

Story told by a man which is most frightening yet thought-provoking experiences of his life.

He had been on a long flight. The first warning of the approaching problems came when the sign on the airplane flashed on: “Fasten your seat belts.”

Then, after a while, a calm voice said, “We shall not be serving the beverages at this time as we are expecting a little turbulence. Please be sure your seat belt is fastened.”

As he looked around the aircraft, it became obvious that many of the passengers were becoming apprehensive. Later, the voice of the announcer said, “We are so sorry that we are unable to serve the meal at this time. The turbulence is still ahead of us.”
And then the storm broke. The ominous cracks of thunder could be heard even above the roar of the engines. Lightening lit up the darkening skies and within moments that great plane was like a cork tossed around on a celestial ocean. One moment the airplane was lifted on terrific currents of air; the next, it dropped as if it were about to crash.

The man confessed that he shared the discomfort and fear of those around him. He said, “As I looked around the plane, I could see that nearly all the passengers were upset and alarmed. Some were praying.

The future seemed ominous and many were wondering if they would make it through the storm. And then, I suddenly saw a girl to whom the storm meant nothing. She had tucked her feet beneath her as she sat on her seat and was reading a book.

Everything within her small world was calm and orderly. Sometimes she closed her eyes, then she would read again; then she would straighten her legs, but worry and fear were not in her world. When the plane was being buffeted by the terrible storm, when it lurched this way and that, as it rose and fell with frightening severity, when all the adults were scared half to death, that marvelous child was completely composed and unafraid.”

The man could hardly believe his eyes. It was not surprising therefore, that when the plane finally reached its destination and all the passengers were hurrying to disembark, he lingered to speak to the girl whom he had watched for such a long time.

Having commented about the storm and behavior of the plane, he asked why she had not been afraid.

The sweet child replied,

“Sir, my Dad is the pilot and he is taking me home.”

when you are sure of your self, your confident level is steady and you are never shaky you do the things calmly and successfully


Isn't this the way trust and confidence in the one you love ought to be?

long back i had read a story of how a gal while crossing a delicate bridge on the river asks her dad to hold the hand when he asks her to hold she says no dad i might leave your hand but if you hold it you wouldn;t ever leave my hand.It takes a lot to gain the level of confidence.Trust once broken is very hard to regain.Its like the baby whom you throw up in air and the baby laughs since he is sure you wouldn't let him fall.

My first ever Blog !

Its been long since I wanted to create a blog ! what stopped me always is unknown even today..May be something within me never permitted me to do so...or may be i was kinda hesitant to put up my thoughts open to the world unknown-you never know who's keeping an eye on you!!! I at times feel i fall short of words to completely express myself this could have been one of the reasons too..

Finally, what got me to this? hmmm well the " चाह " to have my own book published could have been a major driving force..secondly it could be the suppressed thoughts feelings within me mmm,this could have done the trick, finally inspiration of amit to put up my thoughts gave me the required push.... now on hoping to keep up with the motivation/inspritaion blah blah.... would want to keep my blog updated..

but Did I ever understand if blogs were meant to be your personal diary/your scribble pad or was it for the users who read your blogs - you see people are always interested about a celebrity's internal life...hehehehe ( I find hehehe cuter than hahaha)