My Diamond

MY DIAMOND ( this came from my heart )


This is by far the most sincere and honest piece that I have ever written in my whole life, and this is for the most important and the most loving person that i know, I cherish this person ever since I opened my eyes, ever since I took my fist steps, from the time that I had my first full laugh, she watched me grow and have my own life directed by me, she's everything that I've always wanted to be when I grew up,I want to do everything for her just like she does for us, I want to be sweet, I want to be the perfect daughter, I don't want to ever let her down, never, she has always been so proud of me, bragging me, caring for me, protecting me, and I love her so much, I love the smell of her hair, the way she laughs when I tell jokes,I love the way she cooks for us, and I cannot bear the thought of losing her, she is the best in the world, she is the greatest, and she loves me more than anyone could ever do, she is my diamond......


When he came into my life, that's when the nightmare started, I totally became a different person, it's like, I've run away without looking back, I've changed my heart and turned into a person that I cannot fully describe, selfish? unfair? numb? disrespectful? evil? or hurtful perhaps, I can't look at the mirror anymore, cause everytime I do, I get disgusted with myself, I've forgotten all the people that matters the most, I've forggoten all the memories, I neglected all the screams, while I'm in a world of lies and deciets, she cries, waiting for my messages that never came, waiting for my hugs that were never there, she needs me and I ignored her, I can't feel anything anymore, I'm trapped with this feeling that I have for my private demon, instead of standing up for her and with her, I stood up for him, instead of being strong for her, I became weak because of him, and I'm sad, I can't remamber the last time I smiled without pretense, can't remember a lot of things that I love to do, it's all gone now, so is myself, i'm now drifting away, I'm losing myself, she is loosing me, and I'm loosing the people that I love, all because of this deep-undying feeling that I had for this someone, my private demon, i know that this sounds stupid and pointless, but i know, someday, I'll be coming back, from being the old me, I'll be the sweet daughter again, I'll be the funny sister again, i'll be myself again, and I'm going back, I'll be her child again, and  she'll be my diamond..These were my thoughts previously a couple of days ago..but now....






............Boom ! and Yes Today am confidently back..The same ME.. A happy, cheerful, confident, funloving, adorable ME..Mama, Always there for you.. The same old ME may be the better ME..who knows your Value, your love, your affection..